Charlie Klein
When the news broke yesterday that the Chicago White Sox had lost track of their burgeoning starter Bartolo Colon, I had a hard time trying not to laugh. After all, it's been a really bad few weeks to be famous. But then I pictured Bartolo Colon stuffing himself with some Dominican cuisine laughing at the headlines emanating from Chicago, I could no longer help myself. How does a team lose track of a player? Especially a player who is normally on their major league roster. And yet somehow the White Sox were unable to get in contact with their overweight hurler. Even Colon's agent could not locate his client.
With all of us left humming the tune for Where In the World is Carmen San Diego and reaching inside our desk drawers to pull out a dusty old copy of the game, Sox manager Ozzie Guillen speculated on why Colon had fallen off the map.
"I worry about Colon because Colon was a big-time Michael Jackson fan," Guillen said. "He might [watch] the TV and cry all day long. Maybe he is in L.A. at his funeral, because I can't find him. When he gets to Charlotte, Oney (Guillen's son) will call me to say he's there. Nobody knows how big of a Jackson fan Colon was. I'm serious. He might be depressed a little bit."Surely Ozzie must be joking, right? The truth is one never knows with him. Regardless, what a failure by the Chicago White Sox for losing a player that is a regular major league player for their team. The team maintains that Colon will make his rehab start in Charlotte and that they have found him, but his exact whereabouts remain unknown.
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